Living life in colour

I learnt an important lesson today.

I had some bad news last night. I don't want to go in to detail as its pretty personal, however the way I reacted taught me something about my self.

Someone close to me betrayed me in quite a big way.

When I found out I was suprised at how calm I felt. I dismissed any negative emotions and held a positive frame on the situation throughout. I felt that this was the way I should react. I feel this was a sign of my spiritual development.

However, on reflection I now believe the opposite may be true.

By buffering myself from strong emotions, both negative and positive, I've been protecting myself from life itself.

I've been afraid to put my true self out there for risk of being hurt.

I've been experiencing life in a toned down black and white, sheltering from the true colour of life.

Without true risk there's no true reward. What I've been getting in return was a steady contentness.

In truth, the risk is never as big as you perceive it to be. If you put your true self out there, things will fall in to place. The universe will make sure of that.

It took an event like this to open my eyes, and for that I am truely grateful.

Stephen